Support Humor:
ST = Support Team CU = Customer
|
ST: What kind of computer do you have?
CU: A white one... |
CU: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette
out.
ST: Have you tried pushing the button?
CU: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
ST: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note .."
CU: No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on
my desk.. sorry... |
ST: Click on the 'my computer' icon on the left of the screen.
CU: Your left or my left? |
ST: Good day. How may I help you?
CU: Hello... I can't print.
ST: Would you click on 'Start' for me and ...
CU: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill
Gates, damn it! |
CU: Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I
try, it says
'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in
front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it... |
CU: I have problems printing in red...
ST: Do you have a color printer?
CU: Aaaah....................thank you. |
ST: What's on your monitor now ma'am?
CU: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket. |
ST: And now hit 'F8'.
CU: It's not working.
ST: What did you do, exactly?
CU: I hit the 'F- key' 8 times as you told me, but nothing's
happening... |
CU: My keyboard is not working anymore.
ST: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
CU: No. I can't get behind the computer.
ST: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
CU: Okay.
ST: Did the keyboard come with you?
CU: Yes.
ST: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another
keyboard?
CU: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work! |
ST: Your password is the small letter 'a' as in
apple, a capital letter 'V' as in Victor, the number '7'.
CU: Is that 7 in capital letters? |
CU: I can't get on the internet.
ST: Are you sure you used the right password?
CU: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
ST: Can you tell me what the password was?
CU: Five stars. |
ST: What 'Anti-virus Program' do you use?
CU: 'Netscape'.
ST: That's not an Anti-virus Program.
CU: Oh, sorry...'Internet Explorer'. |
CU: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screensaver on my
computer,
but every time I move the mouse, it disappears! |
ST: (Microsoft Tech. Support):. May I help you?
CU: (an elderly woman): Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for
you.
Can you please tell me how long it will take before you can help me?
ST: Uhh..? Pardon, I don't understand your problem?
CU: I was working in 'Word' and clicked the 'Help' button more than 4
hours ago.
Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me? |
ST: How may I help you?
CU: I'm writing my first e-mail.
ST: Okay, and, what seems to be the problem?
CU: Well, I have the letter 'a', but how do I get the circle around it? |
